...and somehow I keep getting up again

So, I did get up again. I did "wipe my boots off" so to speak and tried my best to take matters into my own hands...and I'm still trying. I can't begin to see past this fog I'm living in right now. Oh but I wish I could. I wish for clarity in this frustration. I wish I could know and understand why Dr. Thompson won't order these tests?? That's right, I called, and they haven't been scheduled just because...no reason, just because he won't right the orders and no one will schedule them. I've called multiple times daily. I've stopped by the office & I've even tried ordering the EMG myself through a neurologists office. All to no avail. I feel so broken and weak...so worn down. Somehow though, I'm still pushing through. Still getting up each day and trying again. I've caught myself wanting to give up, but I just know that it's not an option. So I get up, pull myself together, and try again. My life has been proof though that prayers work...miracles...hourly! The timing just isn't mine (I have to remember that). It's just so hard to understand why things are playing out this way when I'm in the midst of it.

Surely something will happen soon. Something good has to come from my perseverence...